his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
