You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing