like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
