hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Randomize
