I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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