I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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