i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
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You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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