Texts From Last Night

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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.

  (407): View more from Florida

  I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.

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  (860): You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you. (407): I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige. http://tfl.nu/6i4m
  Replies (1) Good night (1261) Bad night (365)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules

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  (317): The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules http://tfl.nu/4e2d
  Replies (9) Good night (502) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.

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  (914): Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex. http://tfl.nu/kgv4
  Replies (5) Good night (2847) Bad night (1160) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!

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  (740): at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!! http://tfl.nu/mp48
  Replies (72) Good night (3186) Bad night (1062) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag

  (817): View more from Texas

  could you get any more awkward?

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  (817): you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag (817): could you get any more awkward? http://tfl.nu/636d
  Replies (8) Good night (1044) Bad night (4359)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.

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  (281): Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit. http://tfl.nu/j2fi
  Replies (27) Good night (1369) Bad night (4015) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes

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  (903): I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes http://tfl.nu/cr2r
  Replies (54) Good night (2657) Bad night (5899) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.

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  (215): I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk. http://tfl.nu/289e
  Replies (12) Good night (4602) Bad night (911)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me

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  (973): i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me http://tfl.nu/lmdm
  Replies (20) Good night (6461) Bad night (887) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"

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  (203): So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?" http://tfl.nu/t9pp
  Replies (7) Good night (4933) Bad night (1281) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.

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  (631): Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof. http://tfl.nu/txgs
  Replies (2) Good night (1269) Bad night (524) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.

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  (727): I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing. http://tfl.nu/glhc
  Replies (67) Good night (666) Bad night (6970) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?

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  (501): Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill? http://tfl.nu/quyz
  Replies (11) Good night (1454) Bad night (566)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here

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  (603): Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here http://tfl.nu/t56p
  Replies (1) Good night (243) Bad night (699) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  dont eat that thats our sex nutella.

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  (208): dont eat that thats our sex nutella. http://tfl.nu/y04n
  Replies (10) Good night (717) Bad night (220) Order T-Shirt

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