Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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