He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize