I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch