: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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