so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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