:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
