Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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