Barsexuality is the new black.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.