Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize