Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
