he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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