he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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