i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
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