Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize