Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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