some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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