I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
All the doctor said was why
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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