did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize