So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize