I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
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Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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