Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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