you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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