Three words: puerto rican gang bang
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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