At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
