i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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