If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize