You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize