The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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