Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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