she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?