i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
