You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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