We're facebook friends in real life
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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