you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize