cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize