I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now