Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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