Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
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I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
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I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
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