by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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