Screwed.edu
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
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