the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
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I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
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