C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
should my penis look like a turkey
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
